Jonny May has revealed that he confronted Steve Borthwick after his initial omission from England’s World Cup squad drew his “monkey out”.
May was told he would not be part of the 33 travelling to France in advance of the opening warm-up match against Wales in Cardiff yet would need to stay in camp for the three remaining fixtures.
The Gloucester wing was eventually offered his ticket over The Channel when Anthony Watson was ruled out of the tournament by a calf injury and he celebrated his return by touching down against Fiji.
It ended a rollercoaster month for England’s second highest try-scorer that began with him taking refuge in the gym when he had been given the bad news.
“The truth is that on the Monday before Wales, Steve spoke to me and said ‘as it currently stands you’re not playing at the weekend and aren’t in the 33’,” said the 33-year-old, whose son Jaxon was born in May.
“That got my monkey out, I’ll be honest. I was like ‘well what the hell am I doing here this week’. I felt like that in that moment. I’m not going and I’m not playing at the weekend, so why the hell am I here?
“I went to the gym for 10 minutes and then stomped back to him and said I need another chat.
“I said ‘I’m running this by you because maybe I don’t want to be here this week because why am I here? I’ve got my son at home’.
“He said he didn’t want me to go home because I’m next in and it doesn’t look good if you quit now and then have to be called back in.
“So I was like ‘fair enough, that was a good point’. And I’d done this much time now, just calm down and plough on with it. But that was my initial response.
“I was disappointed because I expressed in week one I wanted a game and an opportunity to play.
“It looked like I wasn’t going to get that and I felt like I’d worked hard and played well and trained well. I really wanted it.
“There’s no right or wrong way to tell somebody they’re not in the team and I understand that from Steve’s part. I reacted angrily but rationally.
“I didn’t scream and shout at him, but I’m glad I stayed and then the opportunity came to stay and train and then I calmed down.
“Then I looked at the bigger picture – I’ve done eight weeks away from home, what’s the harm in three more, trying to get a game and hang on in there?
“Then I’d have felt better than if I hadn’t, knowing I’d given it every possible chance.”
May has returned at a troubled time for England as they enter their pivotal World Cup opener against Argentina on the back of a dismal run of form that has produced five defeats in six Tests.
It means the Pumas are rated marginal favourites to triumph in Marseille on Saturday – a position May insists is being embraced by Borthwick’s squad.
“This time, we’re definitely underdogs. We’re still finding our way, we’re still finding our team, we’re still discovering ourselves,” May said.
“People would think Argentina are favourites for the game. People look at us as underdogs and I think people have written us off a little bit.
“We’re embracing that within this group and paying it as much attention as each person wants to, but ultimately focussing on what we’ve got to do, getting tighter as a group and believing a bit more each day.”
Salt laments 'everything was good apart from the result'
England's stand-in captain Phil Salt took plenty of positives from Wednesday's defeat to Australia, claiming "everything was good bar the result".
Travis Head's superb knock of 59 from just 23 balls, which included plundering 30 from a single over, set Australia on their way.
England fought back with the ball, though, and were ultimately set a target of 180.
But big hitters Salt (20), Sam Curran (18) and Liam Livingstone (37) all went in quick succession as England failed to get going and lost by 28 runs.
"Everything was good apart from the result," said Salt, who was standing in for the absent Jos Buttler.
"They played well. Heady came out swinging in the powerplay and gave them a head start.
"We were a couple of wickets too far down. Heady's done that for a couple of years, it's about how do we shut that down?
"[But] good signs. They played well, we dragged it back, we should have chased it realistically. At times we could have taken partnerships deeper. But we've had a good look at them now."
Australia have won back-to-back T20Is against England for the first time since February 2018, as the hosts failed to win a third straight T20I at The Rose Bowl.
"It was a nice start. Nice to get under way," said Head.
"To set a platform like that with the hitters we had behind us, it was nice to do the job."
Australia captain Mitchell Marsh added: "We certainly looked on course for 200 but did our best to stuff it up, so it's nice to start the series with a win."
Head leads Australia to win as new-look England crumble in chase
Travis Head led the way for Australia, setting them on their way to a comfortable 28-run victory over England in their first of three T20Is on Wednesday.
England had salvaged some pride during Australia's late collapse, only to fumble their chance with the bat as they failed to reach their target of 180.
Australia got off to a flying start, with Head hitting 59 off 23 balls, including 30 off Sam Curran in a single over with three fours and three sixes.
Liam Livingstone helped to slow the tide with 3-22, including taking opener Matt Short (41), before the tourists collapsed, losing their last five wickets for 14 runs, with Jofra Archer taking two in two (2-31), to finish 179 all out.
The hosts just could not get going though, as Phil Salt was caught for 20 before Curran (18) and Livingstone (37) both departed in the space of four deliveries to stunt any England progress.
Jordan Cox (17), one of three debutants, had already been dismissed, thanks to Tim David's stunning catch at full stretch, before the lower order slumped to 151 in the final over.
The second T20I takes place on Friday in Cardiff, where England will attempt to force a decider for the final contest on Sunday.
Data Debrief: Unhappy homecoming
Australia have won back-to-back T20Is against England for the first time since February 2018, but the hosts would have expected much better when they saw the target set for them.
Instead, they failed to win a third consecutive T20 match at The Rose Bowl, their longest outright losing streak at the venue in the history of the format.
Southgate in no hurry to return to football after England departure
Gareth Southgate says he is keeping an open mind about what comes next in his career but is in no hurry to rush back into football.
Southgate stepped down as England manager in July, shortly after England's second consecutive European Championship final defeat.
The 54-year-old was in charge of the Three Lions for eight years, leading the team through four major tournaments, while only Walter Winterbottom (139) and Alf Ramsey (113) managed more games for the national team than Southgate (102).
England are still searching for a new permanent manager, with interim head coach Lee Carsley impressing in his first two matches, leading the team to consecutive 2-0 wins over the Republic of Ireland and Finland in the Nations League.
Southgate has been linked with a move to Manchester United as the pressure piles on Erik ten Hag and with a position at UEFA.
However, the former England manager says he is not expecting to step back into football any time soon.
"I've got lots of opportunities, I'm very open-minded to what's next," he told Sky News.
"That might be in football, that might be outside of football. I'm just going to take some time, refresh, recharge and go from there.
"I think at the moment people know that I need to get my energy back."
Southgate led England to their first major tournament final since 1966 at Euro 2020 and helped the team reach their first final on foreign soil in Germany over the summer.
England also became the first team in history to lose consecutive Euros finals, with Southgate the only manager to ever lose two such matches.
However, his 14 wins at major tournaments are the most of any manager in England's history, and he is proud of the work he did during his time in charge.
"I think it was probably the right time for change," he added.
"I don't think you can have regrets. We made decisions with the information we had at the time to try and produce a winning team. I gave the job everything I had.
"We raised expectations and that was important. We needed to put English football back on the map."
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