The last time Chelsea binned off Frank Lampard, they won the Champions League four months later.
They brought him back, have immediately lost four games on the trot and won't be kings of Europe this year. Nor will they be contesting this competition next year.
Sometimes good things come to an end, but Chelsea and Lampard have past glories they can rely on and seem happy enough together again, so don't cry for them.
All those signings in January, and then this? All the brilliant leadership from Todd Boehly, and then this?
Real Madrid have more past glories than any club in the history of this competition, landing their 14th title last May, and they cleared the Chelsea hurdle after Carlo Ancelotti somehow outwitted Lampard.
Honestly, who saw that coming?
This was football as some sort of abstract performance art from the men in blue and their boss.
Stealth tactics, confuse the hell out of them. Play N'Golo Kante as a roving forward, why not? Have Conor Gallagher as the man nodding down crosses for the little Frenchman, why not? Madrid won't know what's hit 'em!
On seeing Chelsea's starting line-up, featuring world-beating holding midfielder Kante as the frontline attack dog, snooker star and Blues fan Neil Robertson tweeted: "I'm a little confused with this lineup. Hopefully a master plan!"
Sure Neil, let's call this a master plan. Just like playing a frame of snooker with the butt end of a cue would be considered a sound tactic, this was a master plan all right.
Eleven minutes in, this supreme strategy should have brought Chelsea a goal when Reece James' cross broke to an unmarked Kante.
From 12 yards the French World Cup winner surely would hit the opening goal and give Chelsea the dream start they were after.
Reader, he did not. A wild swing of the left boot sent the ball wide, but my word, did Madrid already look confused.
After playing 30 games in the Champions League without ever scoring, it was surely a matter of time before Kante broke that duck in this game. He was born to be the match winner.
James took a hapless touch on another Chelsea attack and Madrid's Vinicius Junior shepherded the ball out of play for a goal kick, being told to 'f*** off' by at least one Chelsea supporter for his efforts.
Madrid were surely on the ropes now with such vitriol adding to their woes.
Sure, Rodrygo whacked a shot against the outside of the Chelsea right post. But the home side were flying.
Kante had four touches in the first 20 minutes, the fewest of any player on the pitch. Madrid were being lulled into a false sense of security, their 2-0 first-leg lead suddenly so vulnerable.
Sure, Luka Modric’s sharp shot from a tight angle was then bundled behind by Chelsea goalkeeper Kepa Arrizabalaga.
Chelsea full-back James got in on the right and looked to play a quick ball to the striker attacking the near post, except that player unfortunately did not exist.
In the 38th minute, Kante was the man dashing down the right, and the makeshift winger’s cross would have been ideal if Chelsea had a striker in their ranks. As it was, it ran through the penalty area and out again before Madrid cleared their lines.
Kante then won a corner, and Kai Havertz flicked it on, Conor Gallagher headed it up, and nobody nodded it in.
In first-half stoppage time, Chelsea had the best chance of the half, when James' delicious low cross from the right inevitably missed the players in the middle and ran through to left-back Marc Cucurella.
The £55million defender was not necessarily acquired for his finishing, having only netted once for Brighton and Hove Albion, and he duly kept up his record of never having netted for Chelsea as Thibaut Courtois kept out his strike.
By half-time, Kante had pulled level with the goalkeepers on 17 touches each. Progress.
The chances kept coming after the break and Kante had another glorious opportunity when Gallagher nodded the ball down. Kante got to the ball and smacked his shot straight at defender Eder Militao.
Havertz trickled a low shot straight at Courtois, and Madrid were surely by now boggled by this master class in mind games. You could knock them down with a feather by this point.
Yet after almost an hour of banter-ball, Madrid scored when a short pass from Vinicius teed up Rodrygo to smash in from close range.
But wait! In the 67th minute, Lampard introduced three players with goals in their veins: Raheem Sterling, Mykhailo Mudryk and Joao Felix.
Hold them back until the game's lost, Frank, then unleash them, baby!
The Spanish giants withdrew Benzema after 70 minutes, sparing him from such advanced confusion tactics.
All Chelsea needed now was four goals.
Madrid scored next, Federico Valverde dancing past Thiago Silva and squaring for Rodrygo to net again. Two-nil on the night, four-nil on aggregate.
Just five goals needed now.
Frank, I don't think this is going quite to plan.
Slot deserves praise for modest approach to Liverpool job – Mills
Arne Slot deserves praise for not being "arrogant" with his approach to succeeding Jurgen Klopp as Liverpool boss, according to Danny Mills.
The Dutchman has made a hugely positive start to life at Anfield since replacing long-serving Klopp ahead of the 2024-25 season.
The 28 points Slot has collected is the joint-most of any manager in their opening 11 Premier League games along with Guus Hiddink at Chelsea.
Liverpool's only blemish on an otherwise perfect start to the top-flight campaign was a 1-0 loss to Nottingham Forest in September.
Indeed, only in 2019-20 (31 points) have Liverpool collected more points after 11 games of a Premier League season than their 28 this campaign.
Former Leeds United and Manchester City defender Mills has been particularly impressed by Slot's approach to a new era at Anfield.
"Arne Slot has surprised me," Mills told Stats Perform. "They did have a difficult defeat against Nottingham Forest at home. That was a defeat not many people saw that coming, but the start he's had is unbelievable. It's incredible.
"Training might be slightly different, but the style of play is very similar. The players are comfortable with it. They've been high-energy, closing people down, and playing at 100 miles an hour when they win the ball back.
"It shows managerial intelligence to understand the players' qualities and build on what they had when they were successful. He hasn't overthought it or tinkered too much.
"He hasn’t been arrogant and said, 'I'm going to rip it up and start fresh'. It wasn't broken; it was already successful. He's just added to it."
Liverpool won a first ever Premier League title during Klopp's eight-and-a-half years in charge, as well the Champions League in 2018-19.
Klopp also lifted the FA Cup, two EFL Cups, the UEFA Super Cup and FIFA Club World Cup, setting a high benchmark to follow.
"Liverpool identified the man they wanted, brought him in, and he's been very clever," Mills added. "He looked at the squad and thought, 'these are good players. I don't need to change too much'.
"That's smart because Liverpool were very successful under Klopp. If you come in and rip up the playbook and it doesn't work, players will question why they're not doing what worked under Klopp."
Liverpool have conceded just six goals in the Premier League this season – four fewer than next-best Nottingham Forest.
They are conceding at a rate of around 0.5 goals per game, compared to around 1.1 in Klopp's final season in charge (41 goals in 38 matches).
"Slot has tweaked things slightly, maybe made them more defensively solid, which they needed to really challenge," Mills said. "Championship-winning or Champions League-winning teams are built on solid defences.
"You don't win without that. He's shored up the defence and allowed the players to continue doing what they were doing before."
Rodri: Messi is the greatest player of all time, without any doubt
Manchester City and Spain star Rodri has suggested that Lionel Messi pipped Cristiano Ronaldo as the greatest footballer of all time.
The 28-year-old was recently awarded the 2024 Ballon d'Or as recognition for a period in which he won the Champions League in 2023 and Euro 2024 with Spain the next year.
Ex-Barcelona man Messi has won three of the last four Ballon d'Ors prior to Rodri, with the midfielder claiming that the latter is the greatest "without any doubt" during an interview on Spanish TV.
"Lionel Messi is the greatest player of all time, without any doubt. Cristiano has managed to match Messi without innate talent. But those of us who have played against them can see the difference," said Rodri, speaking to El Hormiguero.
"We didn’t want Cristiano to step into the box because he was lethal there. But with Messi, the danger was everywhere on the pitch."
Ronaldo has scored a total of 928 goals in his career for club and country, winning 34 major trophies including five Champions League titles. He has also won the Ballon d'Or on five occasions.
Messi, meanwhile, has scored 877 goals, won the Champions League on four occasions and the Ballon d'Or five times, most recently in 2023.
Messi is now at Inter Miami, while Rodri is recovering from an ACL injury at Manchester City, although the two faced each other in LaLiga during the midfielder's spells at Villarreal and Atletico Madrid before his Premier League move.
"When Messi got the ball, you’d think: 'Oh, danger'," he added. "When I first started playing against him, I tried to take the ball from him, and he dodged you as if you were a bull in the ring. The feeling I had was that something bad was about to happen."
Bompastor pleased with Chelsea's rotated side in 3-0 Champions League win over Celtic
Chelsea head coach Sonia Bompastor was delighted with her side's 3-0 home victory over Celtic in the Women's Champions League on Wednesday, which extended her 100% start and secured their place in the quarter-final.
Bompastor's side remain three points above Real Madrid at the top of Group B and can now no longer be caught by third-placed Twente.
"I told the players before the game tonight that it was an opportunity for us to qualify for the quarter-final, and we did that," she told the official club website after the game.
The result comes after a 2-0 victory over Manchester City in the WSL last weekend, which also has them top of that table with seven wins from seven.
"We also remain top of the table, which is also something we want to make sure we achieve. It's great news that we were able to rotate the squad and give opportunities to some players to play a Champions League game again.
"We could rest some players thinking about the Manchester United game [on Sunday]."
One of those players who got on the pitch as a result of that rotation was 17-year-old Lola Brown, who made her professional debut after coming off the bench in the 85th minute.
"It's a special week for her individually, but also for the club," Bompastor said. "I'm really pleased for her and the opportunity for her to come in, especially in a Champions League game.
"She's been training with us and I can see her talent, even if she is young. She's really dynamic as a player, really smart, and really good with the ball. She will progress and this experience tonight will bring her a lot of joy and a lot of confidence.
'As a manager, I worked a lot with the young players, especially when I was at the academy with Lyon, and it's also something special for me when I can give an opportunity to a young player to come in and show themselves. It's really good and shows the good job that the club is doing with young players.'
Aside from Brown, Bompastor made six changes to Chelsea's starting XI for the game and was pleased with the contribution of the players who came in.
"It's been my mindset from the beginning of the season. We play so many games and have to make sure everyone is involved. It's also the opportunity for me to show my trust in the players and the squad.
"It's important because it's not possible for a player to play 90 minutes every three days, especially with a lot of international players who play for their national team and club and travel all around the world. I think that's the way it has to be.'
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